Sunday, January 13, 2008
NYT Op-Ed Discusses the Problems Facing Boys
Lorrie Moore, in the New York Times, discusses the Hillary, Obama and the problems facing boys.
If you were a middle class woman, like my mother, you were fully supported by your husband. You spent the past 60 years never having to worry where your next paycheck was coming from. And, you had to endure the horror of raising 6 kids, cooking, doing laundry, and cleaning house. But, you had a maid to help with that.
In return, your husband provided for all your worldly needs to the best of his ability. Food, clothes, housing, car, dues to the League of Women Voters, etc. If you divorced, your ex-husband was expected to support you in the manner to which you were accustomed. After all the kids are in school, you might go to college and earn a B.A. and M.S. degrees. You still wouldn't work because you didn't need to.
Today boys have been relegated to second class status. Moore mentions the educational system "often feels a form of exile, a system designed by and for white girls." It goes beyond the educational system. My son and I went to the YMCA yesterday. Hanging in the front lobby were 4 large, offical YMCA banners. Of the 10 people depicted in the banners, 7 were female. Of the full-time employees at the local YMCA, except for maintenance staff, all or nearly all are female.
Often if a man is a stay-at-home father, he is viewed as a slacker. Men still get the shaft in divorce even if the spouse is wealthier. Note the Simpson/Lachey divorce, "Nick dropped a bomb in his papers, asking for alimony." It wouldn't have been a bomb if the gender roles were reversed. Note the Spears/Federline child custody situation. Would the courts be continually willing to consider custody for Federline if he was exhibiting the same behaviors as Spears? Not on your life!
Lorrie Moore argues that Obama's time has come and boys, especially blacks, need an inspiration in their lives. Moore wishes Hillary so long and farewell. As do I. When I reviewed the candidates issues pages the other day, Obama was the only candidate that came close to addressing this issue. Perhaps, Obama deserves the nomination not only because he provides inspiration but because he actually see the problems. Plus, the Clintons and Clintonites have spent the past 16 years creating discord in this country for their own aggrandizement. It's time we moved in a better direction.
Hat tip to Ann Althouse.
Does her being a woman make her a special case? Does gender confer meaning on her candidacy? In my opinion, it is a little late in the day to become sentimental about a woman running for president. The political moment for feminine role models, arguably, has passed us by. The children who are suffering in this country, who are having trouble in school, and for whom the murder and suicide rates and economic dropout rates are high, are boys — especially boys of color, for whom the whole educational system, starting in kindergarten, often feels a form of exile, a system designed by and for white girls.I applaud Ms. Moore for taking up the case of boys. A significant difference between where girls/women stood 40 years ago and where boys/men stand now is where they stand. Forty years ago, a females suffered discrimination, and had difficulty entering certain professions, educational institutions, etc. But, what happened to these females due to these societal restrictions?
In the progressive Midwestern city where I live, the high school dropout rate for these alienated and written-off boys is alarmingly high. Some are even middle-class, but many are just hanging on, their families torn apart by harsh economics and a merciless criminal justice system.
Boys are faring worse — and the time for symbols and leaders they can connect with beneficially should be now and should be theirs. Hillary Clinton’s gender does not rescue society from that — instead she serves as a kind of nostalgia for a time when it might have. Only her policies are what matter now, and here — despite some squabbling and bad advice that has caused her to “go negative” — the Democrats largely agree. But inspiration is essential for living, and Mr. Obama holds the greater fascination for our children.
Meanwhile, Mrs. Clinton’s scripted air of expectation might make one welcome any zeitgeisty parvenu. Her “35 years of experience” puzzle in their math. Like Rudolph Giuliani, who wants to keep voters safe from terrorism though his own mayoral bunker was beneath the World Trade Center, Mrs. Clinton wants kudos for the disaster of her failed national health plan. She counts heavily her eight years in the White House. Well, then, she’s already been there! Good for her. Next?
If you were a middle class woman, like my mother, you were fully supported by your husband. You spent the past 60 years never having to worry where your next paycheck was coming from. And, you had to endure the horror of raising 6 kids, cooking, doing laundry, and cleaning house. But, you had a maid to help with that.
In return, your husband provided for all your worldly needs to the best of his ability. Food, clothes, housing, car, dues to the League of Women Voters, etc. If you divorced, your ex-husband was expected to support you in the manner to which you were accustomed. After all the kids are in school, you might go to college and earn a B.A. and M.S. degrees. You still wouldn't work because you didn't need to.
Today boys have been relegated to second class status. Moore mentions the educational system "often feels a form of exile, a system designed by and for white girls." It goes beyond the educational system. My son and I went to the YMCA yesterday. Hanging in the front lobby were 4 large, offical YMCA banners. Of the 10 people depicted in the banners, 7 were female. Of the full-time employees at the local YMCA, except for maintenance staff, all or nearly all are female.
Often if a man is a stay-at-home father, he is viewed as a slacker. Men still get the shaft in divorce even if the spouse is wealthier. Note the Simpson/Lachey divorce, "Nick dropped a bomb in his papers, asking for alimony." It wouldn't have been a bomb if the gender roles were reversed. Note the Spears/Federline child custody situation. Would the courts be continually willing to consider custody for Federline if he was exhibiting the same behaviors as Spears? Not on your life!
Lorrie Moore argues that Obama's time has come and boys, especially blacks, need an inspiration in their lives. Moore wishes Hillary so long and farewell. As do I. When I reviewed the candidates issues pages the other day, Obama was the only candidate that came close to addressing this issue. Perhaps, Obama deserves the nomination not only because he provides inspiration but because he actually see the problems. Plus, the Clintons and Clintonites have spent the past 16 years creating discord in this country for their own aggrandizement. It's time we moved in a better direction.
Hat tip to Ann Althouse.
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